When Jesus comes back, he is going to be mobbed by paparazzi. Unless, of course, L.C. and Heidi are spotted shopping together on Rodeo Drive at the same time the Messiah returns to raise the dead, judge the world, abolish evil, and rule in righteousness for eternity with an iron scepter. In which case, it will be quite a laborious task for society to determine which event is more consequential.
This is how I foresee the news of the Second Coming being delivered exclusively by TMZ.com:
Main Headline: Amy Winehouse Hospitalized After Smoking Poison Sumac.
Subheader: Christ Returns, Mistaken for Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes.
This is assuming that Angelina Jolie did not recently give birth to the Prodigal Son, which is an exceptionally distinct possibility considering the media fare her latest additions to her multicultural menagerie have received.
Blessed art thou whom are able to transcend greed and the cravings of immediate satisfaction. May Mother Angie watch over we victims of first-world consumerism and protect us against a culture that deifies quasi-celebrities with no discernable talent. The meek are still waiting to inherit the earth from such physically and financially beautiful luminaries and, until that day comes, they shall transmogrify their psychologically oppressive environment into the Church of Jolie-Pitt.
Society is an association of institutions held together by a set of artificial values. Your prestige in society is measured by the degree to which you choose to conform to its values. Deviation is met with indignation. Consider the values of your society. Deviation is essential.
